


Love Too Hard

by lilaussieauthor, theauthenticme



Category: Riverdale (TV 2017)
Genre: Angst, Anxiety, Anxiety Attacks, F/F, Hurt/Comfort, Soft Cheryl, Soft Toni, Toni Topaz Needs a Hug, Toni has anxiety, Veronica friendship, choni, small mention of Betty, soft choni
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-03
Updated: 2019-06-03
Packaged: 2020-04-06 15:50:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,206
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19065748
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lilaussieauthor/pseuds/lilaussieauthor, https://archiveofourown.org/users/theauthenticme/pseuds/theauthenticme
Summary: After all the events at the end of season 3, Toni has anxiety about being away from Cheryl. Cheryl is the soft, loving and protective girlfriend we all know her to be. Choni fluff with a whole load of angst!





	Love Too Hard

**Author's Note:**

> We absolutely love writing Choni. No matter who or what else we write, Choni is always number 1.
> 
> This is soft, lots of hurt/comfort and angst for poor Toni. Cheryl is the perfect girlfriend we don't get to see enough of on the show!
> 
> I love the little scene about half way through with the girls at Vixens practise, it was so much fun to write and definitely felt like the cheeky sort of banter and friendship I wish we got more of on the show. 
> 
> Credit to lilaussieauthor for the idea for the title, taken from the song 'Needy' by Ariana Grande.
> 
> TW for mentions of bad anxiety.

 

"Come on, Cher, pick up the phone!" Toni was growing more and more worried as the night progressed. Cheryl had _promised_ she'd be home by 11.30pm at the latest, and here she was, ten minutes past midnight with no sign of her girlfriend and no messages either.

Toni was scared, so petrified that something had happened, and she was working herself into a fit of worry as each minute ticked by with no sign from her redheaded girlfriend. "Pick up, pick up..." Once again, the ring went straight to voicemail and Toni let out a choked swear.

She was already prone to anxiety, already scared that one day when Cheryl left she'd never come back... and now this?

Cheryl lost track of time, her phone battery having died hours before. She had meant to charge it before she went, but her and Toni had got a little too carried away with their _rendezvous_ and it had completely slipped her mind.

...

"Thanks for making sure I got home safe Ronnie" Cheryl waved at the raven haired girl, letting herself quietly in through the door. She looked at the time. It was almost 12.30am the morning. "L

"shit, sorry my love" she knew Toni wouldn't hear her, she guessed Toni would have been fast asleep by now. She'd have to make it up to her tomorrow.

Toni was up like a flash, running downstairs as soon as she heard the door open. She practically jumped the last few steps, stumbling into the living area and throwing herself at Cheryl, finding all of her anger suddenly dissipated and replaced with overwhelming relief.

"Toni? I thought you'd have been asleep hours ago" Cheryl wrapped Toni up in her arms, unsure as to why she was getting such a strong reaction.

"My phone died and I lost track of time, but Ronnie made sure I got home safe. Has everything been okay here? Are you okay?"

Toni shook her head, burying her swollen cheeks in Cheryl's top and breathing her in. "Y-You said you'd b-be home an _hour_ a-ago," she whispered, tears rolling down her cheeks. "I was so w-worried, Cher." She clung tight to the redhead, shaking in her arms.

"Hey..hey." Cheryl comforted her girlfriend, a little concerned about why she was so het up about this. "Why don't we go up to bed and we can snuggle huh?"

Toni nodded, her face all crumpled up. "C-Carry me," she whimpered. "P-please, Cher, don't let go."

This wasn't like Toni _at all_. "Of course my love.." Cheryl got them both safely up to their room and into bed, quickly pulling on her pyjamas and brushing her teeth. She slid into the bed beside Toni and immediately pulled her into her arms.

Toni trembled against her, pressing her lips to Cheryl's shoulders, face and neck over and over to try and assure herself that her girlfriend was there... safe... with her.

Her tears rolled down her cheeks and fell onto Cheryl's skin, little droplets of salty water on pale alabaster. 

"Hey..hey..what's all this?" she asked softly, wiping Toni's tears with her thumb.

Toni hiccupped, trying and failing to stop crying as she propped herself up over Cheryl and looked down at her. "I th-thought I l-lost you," she whispered.

If it had've gotten to 1am she would've been out on her motorbike searching herself. "God, Cheryl, I thought maybe your mom had done something... or someone had h-hurt you..."

"You're never going to lose me T.." she tried to reassure. "My mom hasn't been seen for _months_..." she reminded her. "Im fine babe."

 _I'm fine._ A sentence that Toni would always associate with the exact opposite. A sentence spoken by Cheryl herself way too many times before she broke down in tears, a sentence Toni Topaz had used herself to hide what she truly felt. A sentence that now, in the present moment, had Toni reduced to long cries again, throwing a leg over Cheryl's waist as she struggled to get closer with a soft whine.

"I honestly am. We _both_ are.." she reassured, rubbing Toni's back, their bodies pressed impossibly close.

Toni took a shuddering breath, wringing the fabric of the front of Cheryl's shirt in clenched fists as her tears left dark stains on the very same fabric.

"Just breathe.." Cheryl soothed, her hand never leaving Toni's back as the other ran softly through her pink locks.

Toni did, calming down somewhat but not moving an inch, desperate to stay as close to Cheryl as she could.

"What can I do to help?" Cheryl asked worriedly. "You name it.."

"K-Kiss me," Toni said with a soft whimper. "Please, Cheryl, I need t-to know you're... here... with m-me, and s-safe, god, I need t-to know you're s-safe..."

"I'm safe..we both are.." she reminded her again, holding her cheeks as she kissed her softly.

Toni threw herself into the kiss, changing it from soft to passionate in a matter of seconds, her lips working hard against Cheryl's in a burning need to ground herself. "I-I'm sorry," she gasped, butting her head against Cheryl's before taking her lips again. "I'm s-so sorry."

"Toni, you have _nothing_ to be sorry for. I'd be lying though if I said I wasn't somewhat concerned though my love."

Toni pulled away with a sigh, reaching up to wipe her cheeks. "I'll b-be fine," she whispered, though she felt anything but. "Y-You're here now..."

" _You'll be fine?_ " Cheryl repeated quietly with the shake of her head. That definitely wasn't going to cut it. "I want to know what's going on babe."

Toni gave a quiet hiccup, burying her face in Cheryl's chest and mumbling incoherently into her girlfriend's now tear-dampened top.

"Can you try that again baby?" Cheryl asked, gently guided Toni's head up so their eyes met.

Toni sniffed. "I j-just got so... _so_ worried... I thought I w-was gonna l-lose you again... that, that maybe you weren't g-gonna come h-home..."

"Oh TT.." she felt so guilty. "I'm sorry. I should have called you from Ronnie's phone so you weren't worried."

"It's o-okay," Toni whispered. "I-I'm just being st-stupid..."

"No..no you're not at all baby. You had every right to be worried after all we've been through these past few years."

"Just don't... don't wanna l-lose you," Toni's eyes filled again as she thought back on all the times they'd almost been forced apart.

"I know..I know T. I don't want to lose you either and we won't okay? We _won't_ , because I love you and you love me and that's enough to get us is through anything."

Toni nodded softly, sniffing again she wiped her cheeks, snuggling back down into Cheryl. "P-Promise me you w-won't let me g-go," she whispered.

"I promise. And I'll do whatever it takes to make you believe it okay?"

"Okay," Toni whispered, her eyes drooping closed as Cheryl's hands kept raking through her hair and over her body. "Love you."

"Love you too" she kissed the tip of her nose, continuing to soothe her until she fell asleep.

....

It had been almost a week since Cheryl had come home late and Toni was still on edge.

Every time her girlfriend left her she felt this climbing anxiety, a steadily growing panic that only diminished once she had Cheryl within close proximity once more.

Like now, for example. They were at Vixens training, and Cheryl had just left to demonstrate a lift with Betty and Veronica, and Toni felt her chest clench as she rushed after the redhead and interwove her fingers with Cheryl as they watched the two girls practise it.

Cheryl welcomed the contact, although she was more than aware that Toni's need to be close had somewhat increased the past week. "You okay babe?" She checked quietly as she watched the two girls in front of her.

Toni nodded, swallowing thickly. "Fine," she said softly. She hadn't exactly clearly outlined what had been happening to Cheryl... hadn't told her girlfriend the heavy weight she felt when they were apart, the sick feeling that settled in her stomach unless she knew Cheryl was safe.

"Sure?" She clasped both of Toni's hands between her own, her eyes searching Toni's.

Toni smiled up at her. "Am now," she said truthfully.

"Come help me then.." she wrapped an arm around Toni's waist, pulling her to her side as she observed Betty and Veronica.

"You need to _smile_ Betty" she admonished. "Winners always smile."

Toni looked at the ground, not sure what exactly Cheryl wanted help with, before tilting her head up to meet Veronica's eyes, leaning closer into Cheryl's touch.

"So just to clarify, you two don't actually have to put in any practice for this routine, but _still_ get to be the stars upfront with the solos?" Ronnie checked.

Toni blushed. "We do our own practise V" she winked. 

"That we do TT" Cheryl chuckled. "I can assure you Ronnie, my TT and I are probably the most athletic members of the team. We get _a lot_ of cardio in..we just prefer to do our practise in private" she chuckled, winking at Ronnie.

Veronica glared at them before grinning at Betty's beet-red cheeks. "Shut up, you're making Betty uncomfortable."

"Oh Betty my dear, dear cousin.." Cheryl saw her red cheeks and shook her head softly.

"I am so _not_ uncomfortable" she defended, blushing more.

"You so are" Toni giggled. "We're sorry, Betty... we'll stop... _maybe_." 

"Hey! Listen..., Jug and I have a full and active sex life. I'm not _embarrassed_ by sex. You go ahead and talk about it all you like. Don't listen to V."

Toni wasn't sure whether to grimace or laugh. "TMI, Betty Cooper. But.. you know, if you want us to, Cher and I can go on... and on... and on."

"Oh I'm sure you can" Veronica tapped her shoulder. "Being so _athletic_ and all.." she chuckled, the lightheaded banter a welcome presence.

"Cheryl's very flexible," Toni piped up, grinning as Betty's face flushed darker. "Isn't that right, babe?"

Now Cheryl was the one to blush. "Extremely" she grinned. "Now ladies. As _delightful_ as this conversation is, can I remind you that some of our Vixens are freshman? _Far_ too young for such conversation." She glanced over to the younger members who where infact not even close to being within hearing distance.

Toni shrugged. " _You_ getting embarrassed, Cher?" she chuckled. "Never thought I'd see the day."

"Hey, I'm not embarrassed.." she tried to defend herself. "Im just thinking of dear cousin Betty and those innocent freshman. Don't ever let it be said that Cheryl Blossom doesn't think about the needs of others."

Toni grinned proudly. "Never."

Ronnie rolled her eyes. "Oh please" although there was no malice behind her words.

"Being mean to my girlfriend, Lodge?" Toni teased, still never moving from Cheryl's grasp. "I have a few things to say about that."

Ronnie narrowed her eyes a little, nodding her head towards Cheryl and Toni. Their bodies pressed together side by side. "And will you be saying those while you're joined at the hip to Cheryl, or after you detach yourself from the Cherry Bomshell herself?"

"While," Toni said softly, all traces of fun falling from her tone. She looked at the ground, letting out a long breath.

All 4 girls picked up on the change in mood, no one daring to say anything.

It was Cheryl who finally broke the silence. "I was thinking. We haven't had a sleepover at Thistlehouse in a while. How about tonight? It's Friday so no school tomorrow.."

Toni looked up at her. “Okay.”

Betty and Veronica nodded with a smile. “Sounds good.”

"Perfect. Come over anywhen from 7. We can order take out and then just have a relaxing evening. I think we could all do with it."

....

When 7pm rolled around, Toni was curled up on top of Cheryl when there was a knock at the door and Cheryl stirred from underneath her.

Toni bit back a whine as Cheryl left to go open the door, Betty and Veronica making their presence known with loud hellos. She watched them from the living room, curled up in the corner of the couch, smiling softly as they came in and sat opposite her.

Cheryl was back by her side and Toni immediately curled back into her side, letting out a long sigh once she did.

"Thank you for inviting us. We brought snacks..." Ronnie placed them all on the coffee table. "We went a little crazy but I know much you love your Twizzlers Cher." She chuckled.

  
Cheryl pulled Toni close again, knowing. The closeness helped her girlfriend to feel safe.

Toni smiled up at them, falling back into her easy going self once she had Cheryl close. “I’m definitely not complaining about the abundance of snacks... thanks for coming.”

"We can order whenever you want to ladies. It's on me and the choice is all yours" Cheryl laid back more comfortably on the couch.

Toni was silent, looking to the girls to see what they wanted.

"I'm fine with anything" Betty smiled.   
"Me too. You pick Toni.." Ronnie smiled towards her.

Toni sighed. “Leave all the important decisions up to me why don’t you?” She laughed, bringing a hand up to trail along Cheryl’s leg. “Uh... dyou wanna just get Pops?”

"Whatever you want TT" she smiled. "If you're happy..i'm happy." She was aware that Toni wasn't herself but wasnt sure _why_. 

Toni nodded. “Lets do that then... but can we get it delivered?” She  _really_ didn’t want to leave Cheryl.

"As the owner of the fine establishment that is Pops, I'm afraid to say we don't currently offer deliveries. But, i'm sure I can call in a favor. No point being the owner without some perks right?" Veronica smiled.

Toni grinned at her. “Thanks, Ronnie.”

"Always happy to help out my favorite girls" she grinned. Once they had all shared what they wanted, she called Reggie with the order, him agreeing to drop it round personally as soon as it was cooked.

"I'm going to go get drinks for everyone" Cheryl smiled, Betty jumping up to help her, following her into the kitchen. 

Toni’s breath caught as she watched Cheryl walk out, bringing her knees up to her chin as she focused on the fact she _knew_ Cheryl was okay.. she was just in the other room... everything was fine.

"Toni?" Veronica asked quietly from where she sat on the couch across from her. "Is everything okay?"

Toni flinched, her eyes flicking up to meet the soft brown ones. “Huh? Yeah... I’m fine.”

"Are you?" Veronica moved from her couch, sitting herself down beside Toni.

Toni backed up away from her. “I’m _fine_ Ronnie.”

"Hey..hey..it's okay.." she moved further back, not wanting to scare her.

Toni looked up at her. “I’m fine.”

"You're _really_ not.." Veronica have her a worried glance. "You've barely left Cheryl's side all week.."

“I’m allowed to want to be close to my girlfriend!”

"Toni..of course you are. I'm not saying it's not..it's just..I've known you for the past two years and this isn't like you. I'm only concerned because I care."

Toni sighed, ducking her head. "I know... I'm sorry." She wasn't concentrating properly, trying to ignore the screaming need that Cheryl wasn't close, that she wasn't protected, that Toni wasn't with her...

"I know we've not always been super close but..I'm here for you you know? You've been a good friend to me and I want to do the same for you."

Toni nodded, her teeth worrying at her lip. "Ronnie... do you ever feel like you're destined to just keeping losing people?"

"Uh.." whatever Veronica has expected Toni to say, it wasn't _that_. "I mean..i guess I've never really thought about it. What do you mean T?"

Toni shook her head, falling silent. "Don't worry about it."

"No...Toni please.." the truth was, she _was_ worried now. "You can talk to me".

Toni bit her lip. "I k-keep getting s-so scared Cheryl's gonna l-leave me... every time she's a-away from m-me I feel so s-sick and worried and p-panicked..." she trailed off quietly. "It's hard to explain."

"You're doing well.." Veronica praised, reaching her hand out to give Toni's a soft squeeze.

Toni tensed at her touch. "It's like... ever since the night she w-was with you... I can't stop worrying. Like... every second she's away from me m-my chest gets tight... and it's happening _now_ Ronnie..." she looked frantically around for Cheryl. "Part of my brain c-can't seem to grasp the f-fact that she's safe... just in the room o-over there... I'm s-scared."

"That can't be easy feeling like that all the time." Veronica sympathized. "Have you..have you told Cheryl how you're feeling?"

Toni shrugged. “It would be hard to explain to her.." she said again.

"I think Cheryl would understand.." Veronica told her softly. "Has she noticed anything?" It seemed so obvious to Veronica, surely Cheryl must have had an idea what was going on.

Toni looked up. “I think so... she hasn’t commented, though...”

"She hasn't?" Veronica frowned. She as pretty sure if Cheryl knew, she would have had something to say. "what triggered it?"

Toni blinked back tears. “She promised she’d be home by 11:30...”

"Go on.." Veronica encouraged, not quite getting why Cheryl being late had upset her so much.

“And she didn’t get home until, like, 12:30... and that one hour, god, Ronnie. It was torture! I was so scared... couldn’t breathe, she wasn’t picking up her phone - last time she didn’t pick up, Veronica, Penelope took her to the sisters!” She broke off with a strangled sob. “I can’t lose her, Veronica. I’ve lost _everyone_ , my whole life... I can’t lose Cheryl.” The knot in her chest was back, begging to be relieved with Cheryl’s warm arms.

"Try and breathe Toni..you're not going to lose her." she whispered softly. "Do you..do you want me to go get Cheryl now?"

Toni nodded quickly, her eyes filling with tears. “Please...”

"Okay..just hang on a sec okay?"

Veronica headed towards the kitchen. "Uh..Cheryl? Toni needs you. Betty and I will hang back and sort the drinks.."

"Is she okay?" Cheryl worried.

"Not really.." Veronica sighed. "She needs to talk to you."

Cheryl nodded and hurried from the kitchen. "Toni?"

Toni looked up at her, her chest loosening slightly. “ _Cher_..”

"What's wrong my love?" She was instantly at Toni's side, joining her on the couch.

Toni scrambled into her lap, snuggling in with a soft sigh as her anxiety vanished, happily butting her head into Cheryl’s neck. “I’m fine now.”

"Ronnie was really worried. What happened?"

Toni shook her head, snuggling closer in. “It's dumb,” she mumbled.

"It's not dumb TT..whatever it is..I want to know. To _help_."

Toni shrugged. “I already told you. I don’t wanna be a bother...”

"Baby. You are never a bother to me. Please never think that."

“Okay...” Toni’s voice was soft. “But B and V are here...”

"We can leave them with the food and a movie and go upstairs and talk if you'd like to T."

Toni shook her head. “That’s mean... they’re our guests.”

"If that's what you need, I think we should TT. They'd understand.." Cheryl ran her fingers along Toni's arm. "We won't be forever."

Toni sighed. “Okay... I just don’t wanna be rude...”

“Rude?” Betty asked, coming into the room with a tray of drinks in her arms. “Who’s being rude?”

"Would you guys mind starting the movie without us? We won't be long..I just really need to talk to Toni."

Veronica nodded, nudging Betty as she frowned. “Of course... we can wait for you if you’d like?”

"No..no..don't wait. You guys enjoy and we'll join you in a bit." Cheryl took Toni's hand and led her upstairs.

"V? What's going on with them?" Betty asked.

Veronica smiled at her. “Toni’s... not very good at opening up when she’s upset... she needs to talk to Cheryl, she’s been feeling kind of bad and Cheryl just needs to know, you know?”

"I get that" Betty nodded. "I hope she's okay."

“She will be,” Veronica said with a confident nod.

....

Toni wasn’t okay. As soon as they were upstairs, out of earshot, she fell on top of Cheryl and clutched at her, pulling her forward by the material of her top to rus her head into her chest.

"TT..hey..I'm here.." Cheryl promised, pulling her into her lap. "You're okay.."

“You’re here,” Toni whispered. “Safe...”

"We're both safe.." Cheryl promised. "But you need to talk to me..tell me what's going on."

“I’m so scared” Toni burst out. “So, so scared...”

"What of? What's scaring you so much baby?"

“Y-You,” Toni whimpered. “No..I didn't mean..you. That... that sounded bad, I’m sorry... I just... I can’t _lose_ you, Cher... I can’t...” she broke off, her hands trailing her wrists. “I can’t.”

"You're not _ever_ going to lose me TT. We've fought our way through so much..you're stuck with me for life. Unless of course you don't want to be..I'd never hold you back.." she rambled.

"No... no, I want you to stay with me forever... it's just..." she trailed off. "I told you, it's dumb..."

"I promise you, I don't ever think anything you say is remotely dumb."

Toni nodded. Normally she'd come back with a silly comment just to try and prove Cheryl wrong but she just wasn't in the mood tonight. "Every time you're gone, Cher..."

"Everytime I'm gone.." she promoted softly. "What babe? Say it.."

"My chest," Toni whispered. "It's like I can't breathe... I get so scared... even if you're just in the other room, I panic until I know you're okay..."

"Toni.." Cher let out a soft sigh. She hated to think she had triggered all this anxiety in her girlfriend. "Im so sorry."

"It's not your f-fault," Toni mumbled. "'S just... last time you d-didn't answer your phone your mom had taken you... left you at the sisters... those were some of the worst weeks of my _life_ Cher, and we w-weren't even to - together! And next time.... what if next time the ghoulies have you? Or my uncle? Or the freaking black hood or the gargoyle kind? Our town i-is so m-messed up, Cher, and I've already lost everyone I love... I can't lose you too." She turned away, lip trembling as tears fell from her wide eyes. "Please, Cheryl, I can't..."

"You won't TT, I promise. We always look out for each other. Well both be okay..I know we will."

"O-Okay," she whispered. "I'm just so... _worried_. Every time you're not near me... it's like I can't breath right til I can see you... til I'm holding you... til I know you're safe... it's not good, C-Cher..."

"No..no..we can't have you going on like that. What do you think might be able to help?"

"I don't know" Toni said helplessly.

"You name and I can do it babe. You'd can't go on like you were."

“I know... I know I can’t, I just don’t know how...”

"I'm not sure I know either.." she trailed off.

Toni started to cry. She wanted to know... for something to be concrete rather than up to chance. “Cher, _help_...”

"I will...I will...I just don't want to get it wrong."

“M-Me neither,” Toni whimpered. “I’m s-stuck... I’m s-sorry I’m b-bothering you...” she felt so bad, like she’d inconvenienced Cheryl and was just being... a parasite. Something that took and took and never gave back.

"Babe...you're never bothering me. Please don't think that.." she kissed her cheek softly. "I know it feels like you're stuck but you're not. We'll get past this okay? We _will_ , even if it doesn't feel like that right now."

Toni nodded hesitantly. "You promise?"

"Forever and always" she nodded, their foreheads touching.

Toni sniffed, nestling her head into Cheryl's chest. "Do we have to go back down yet?"

"Course not..we can stay up here as long as you want" she was playing with Toni's hair. "What do you need TT?"

Toni honestly didn't know. "S-Something to ground me..."

"Of course..Anything you had in mind?" She asked softly.

Toni shook her head. "Any... anything."

"How about this T?" She moved her hands to Toni's shoulders, starting to massage them slowly in an effort to relax her tense girlfriend.

"Oh... yeah," Toni breathed, starting to relax. "God, that's nice."

"You should know better than anyone how good I am with my hands" she grinned, continuing to work her shoulders and back.

Toni gave a soft laugh. "Offering to demonstrate that, Blossom?"

"Not tonight" she kissed the side of her neck. "But that can be something for you to look forward to tomorrow instead."

Toni grinned. "Why can't we just kick Betty and Veronica out? Tomorrow's so long away."

"Nu-uh. That would make us _terrible_ hosts TT and _we_ are amazing hosts. Well..usually.." she gestured to their current set up.

Toni whimpered. "I'm sorry..."

"No need to be babe" she kissed the back of her shoulder where she was still kneading soft circles into it.

She sighed, snuggling closer in. "How long can we stay here until we're deemed _truly_ terrible hosts?"

"They have food and a movie..they're good.." she reassured her girlfriend.

"Kay..." Toni whispered. "Coz I don't wanna move."

"You don't need to move yet..you just try and relax for now okay?"

"I'm trying, Cheryl, I promise I am."

"I know..I know you are.." she agreed.

Toni trembled,  turning around suddenly and throwing her tiny body at Cheryl's, wrapping her tight in a hug. "Please hold me..." her anxiety was back. 

"Always.." she would do anything to help Toni to feel better. "I thought we were working on helping you relax?"

"We were. I don't know what happened. Just.. don't let go. Please.."

"I won't..I promise I'm not letting go.."

"Never let go..." Toni mumbled, finally relaxing. "Don't leave me..."

"I won't..not ever.." she promised. "But we can't spend every second together T."

Toni whimpered. "I know..." it hurt to admit but she knew it was true... god, last time they'd been together for too long it had ended disastrously. But that didn't mean the thought of letting Cheryl go was filling her with anything but anxiety and dread.

"We need to work on your anxiety though babe. I don't want you to get stressed and anxious like this everytime we have to spend time apart."

Toni nodded, her lip wobbling again at the mere _thought_. "I don't know h-how."

"Maybe this is bigger than us..maybe we need to get some support in dealing with this."

Toni bit her lip. "Y-You think?"

"Possibly TT. I don't know how to make this better for you."

Toni whined, tears falling down her cheeks. "Me n-neither..."

"We can get some professional advice..or we could maybe talk to Ronnie and Betty. They might have some advice.."

Toni nodded. "P-Please... I don't wanna talk about this with them right now..." honestly, the idea was just adding to her anxiety. "Can we just go down with the girls?"

"Just go down and enjoy the evening?" Cheryl checked.

"Y-Yeah," Toni whispered. "That."

"of course my love."

....

Toni followed her down with a quiet hiccup, standing awkwardly beside the couch as Cheryl sank in. "C-Can I...?" She wasn't quite sure whether her clinginess was annoying the redhead, but _god_ , her chest was tight.

Cheryl pulled her onto her lap, showing Toni that of course it was alright. She wanted Toni to feel happy and safe.

Toni nestled in close, giving Cheryl a soft kiss before looking up to Betty and Veronica. "S-Sorry... about t-that."

"Hey..please don't say sorry for our benefit. Betty and I have enjoyed the movie and some fold, we're all good."

Toni giggled lowly. "Is there any of that said food left for me and Cher?"

"It's keeping warm in the oven.." Veronica smiled. "I know how Cheryl hates cold French fries."

Toni laughed as Cheryl pretended to gag. "They're gross!"

"Lucky they're still warm then" Betty chuckled. "Are you two okay?"

Toni shrugged. “We will be.”

"Thanks for asking" Cheryl smiled at them. "We appreciate the concern, you're good friends to us both."

Toni nodded, sighing deeply as she snuggled in closer to Cheryl. “Sorry for keeping you waiting.”

"It's no trouble. As long as you're okay that's all that matters" Veronica hoped their talk had helped somehow. 

Toni nodded. “Getting there.”

"We're here if you need us okay?" Veronica added, knowing they'd say the same if the roles were reversed.

"That means the world to me... to us." Toni smiled in thanks. 

"Are you hungry TT? I'll go get us that food if you are."

Toni shook her head quickly, still desperate to stay close to Cheryl, and then second guessed herself. "I-If you want food... go get it..."

"Do you want to go get it? Or shall I?" Cheryl asked softly. 

"Don't... don't mind," Toni whispered. "Whatever you want."

"You go get it.." Cheryl eased Toni off her lap, knowing it would help her to keep busy. "I'm not going anywhere."

It took all of Toni's willpower to pull away from Cheryl, her heart beating erratically as she walked slowly into the kitchen.

 _She's just out there... not going anywhere._ The thoughts repeated through her mind as she pulled the fiOS numbly from the over. _Just in the other room. She's safe._

She got their drinks from the fridge, tears brimming in her eyes. _Safe... with Ronnie and Betty, no one's hurting her..._

She piled it all on a tray and walked back into the living room, her face splitting into a soft smile when she saw Cheryl.

"Got... got the food," she croaked, setting it on the table and nestling back into Cheryl's side.

"Thank you T.." she linked their hands as Toni was back at her side. "See? It's all okay right?"

Toni nodded against her. "Y-yeah... I guess so..."

"It is..we're all okay.." she promised. "And once the weekend is over, we'll see about getting some more expert advice about all this okay?"

Toni sighed, her hand squeezing Cheryl's. "Okay."

"For now? Let's just try relax and and enjoy the evening with our friends."

"Okay," she said again, shaking her head softly to clear her thoughts and turning to Veronica, stealing a fry from Cheryl's hand as she did so. "Where were you up to in the movie?"

"About half way in? We went for Bring it On which is a retro classic!" Veronica chuckled."even my mom used to watch it she was younger."

"Awesome," Toni said softly. "Press play... let's go." Honestly, she just wanted something to take her mind off everything, and an old movie would do just that.

"One step ahead of you there.." she grinned, the remote already in her hand.

Toni sighed as the movie resumed playing, snuggling deeper into Cheryl as she watched. She wasn't okay, not yet, but she'd get there. They always did.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading. I have enjoyed this one so much, writing Choni is always a favorite of mine.
> 
> I hope you all enjoy this too, it's so lovely to read your comments! 
> 
> Our prompt list is fairy full right now, but please do feel free to leave more prompts below! We love prompts! 😁


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